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October 2009

The Alternate Ending: Good Guys Finish Last

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I’ve often wondered what life would be like as a Disney movie with a song or musical number every five minutes, the good guys always coming out on top, and the villains getting crushed into oblivion. But when the cameras stop rolling, and reality hits, life is nothing like a Disney movie. The heroes are pushed aside and the bad guys get exactly what they want with no consequences at all.

In a school as competitive as AHS, people have this mentality that in order to get far in life, you must do whatever it takes to get ahead. If impressing a teacher means taking credit for other people’s work, then so be it. If getting an instant invite into the popular crowd means spreading nasty rumors about someone, consider it done. When I saw Cady take down Regina in Mean Girls so that she could rule the school’s social scene, I thought it was extreme. In actuality, this type of drama takes place on a daily basis. People spread rumors and try to damage other people’s reputations so that they’ll end up where they want to be. It’s all about the grades, reputation, and status. Soon that becomes the only focus, and people stop caring whether or not others get hurt in the process.

I’ve also seen people ride on other people’s coattails to get what they want, and the fact that these people never suffer from severe rug burn or have super static-y hair afterward is quite puzzling and frustrating. When someone doesn’t pull their weight in group projects, for example, everyone else is so afraid for their grades that they need to pick up the slack. I know I get extremely frustrated when faced with this type of situation; I can barely even carry the weight of my own backpack, let alone carry their weight as well. I now understand why I am vertically challenged: the whole "carrying weight" situation has happened way too many times. The slackers, on the other hand, have it made: when the project gets a good grade, they take all of the credit, and when it crashes and burns, they’re able to say they had nothing to do with it (literally). Why don’t these people get what they really deserve? Is it too much to ask for good people to reach their goals and for bad people to have to buy Neosporin later on?

Perhaps these people can get away with pulling stunts like these because they know exactly what to say and do to confuse and convince others, making it so that the innocent (but confused) ones get the shorter end of the stick. These are the types of people who know just what to say to wrap others around their pinky fingers. They use their cunning and Weapons of Mass Manipulation in Disguise (W.O.M.M.I.D.) to force innocent bystanders into servitude. This is a serious issue. I don’t understand why when I try to report a W.O.M.M.I.D. to teachers I get a psychiatrist and a long talk from my parents. What the "professionals" don’t know is that a (poison-laced) compliment, a (forced) smile, or (an explosion of) sweet talk can all be used to influence people. These scheming members of society possess a mind-controlling device (not yet patented!) that flies under the radar. Apparently the words "world domination" mean very little in the Department of Homeland Security.

These people do a great job covering up their tracks and hiding their evil motives from the rest of the world; they don’t wear camouflage clothing and lurk in the bushes (most of the time) or anything like that, they just put on this act of innocence and unaware of the damage they’re causing. They’re so well-hidden that we don’t realize that our school is teeming with them. What’s ironic about all of this is that the amount of work put into leading people on and tricking others into doing the dirty work is probably equal to, if not more than, the work put into honestly achieving goals and earning rewards. The good, hardworking people who truly deserve respect and repute to match are being pushed aside and stepped all over. In fact, the terms "pushover" and "doormat" have been long out of use; in today’s society, these people can be referred to as "trampolines," for not only are they stepped on, but they also are used to launch "bad guys" closer towards their goals.

What do these villains get for treating people like inanimate objects? Good grades, a seat in the popular crowd, the last chocolate chip cookie; the list goes on and on. Isn’t this the time when karma is supposed to kick into gear and "reward" (punish) these people for their wrongdoings? Then again, maybe karma has already done its part: maybe in their next lives, these people will become trampolines (hopefully) so people can jump on them and use them for a change.

However, whether or not they’ll turn into trampolines will not become clear right away. So in the meantime, when faced with a W.O.M.M.I.D.-carrying-credit stealing-rumor-spreading-disguised-conniving person, all you need to do to in order to keep them away from you is remind them that Neosporin is getting kind of pricey nowadays. Ooh, [rug] burn.

 

Note to Self: A Letter to the Past

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Hello there, my relatively naïve, delightfully more innocent, and altogether younger self. I take it you’re doing moderately well—I should know. After all, I’ve been through it all before. As I’m sitting in front of my computer screen here, heavily afflicted with the ever-prevalent and notorious disease known commonly as "senioritis," I’ve been thinking a lot more. Sometimes I’m thinking about important things, like the meaning of life. Other times I’m thinking of ways I can put off my homework even longer. But I sit here, typing up everything I’ve accomplished in the past four years, finding the list disappointingly and excruciatingly short. Feeling just a little bit on the lonely side, I think about all the things I could have done to be a little less disappointed right now. I think about all the things I only wish that you knew—that is, things I wish that I knew back when I was you. Does that makes any sense, grammatically? I wish you knew more about grammar.

I wish you weren’t so terribly mean to your brother, because I’m pretty sure he resents me now. I want you to know that you’ll regret breaking all those promises. I wish you let Mom and Dad know that you appreciate them a bit more, because I think they’ll miss me when I leave. I wish you didn’t quit Colorguard. I wish you didn’t give up on what you loved. I wish you pursued your dreams and chased those windmills. I wish you knew that that haircut was not a good idea at all. I wish you didn’t wear flip-flops on that day your toenail flipped off. I wish you knew that backing up your computer files is a good idea. I wish you didn’t think your immune system was all that powerful. Eat more fruits and vegetables, please. I wish you would have thought twice before just blowing off the handle like that. I wish you knew how to filter the kind of things that come out of your mouth. I wish you thought about the consequences of your actions, because some of them still affect our relationships with certain people to this very day.

I wish you didn’t just resign yourself to being bad at math; I wish you didn’t just give up and settle into a comfortable mediocrity because years later, it’s not comfortable at all. I wish you knew that sometimes, there is a limit to how much Internet access is truly necessary. I wish you knew that not doing homework would actually mess up your grade pretty badly. Heck, I wish I remembered this more often too. That’s one of our biggest mistakes. Underestimation. We underestimate the value of the mundane task until it piles up and becomes something unmanageable. We underestimate the value of a kind word every once in a while. We completely and terribly underestimate our own self worth. I wish you challenged yourself more. I wish you stopped seeking approval earlier, because that was quite a waste of time. I wish you got up from that chair that I’m sitting on more often, because frankly, it’s kind of sagging from being sat on so much. I wish you went out and saw the world. I wish you simply just tried harder.

Dear past me, as I’m writing this to you, I know that in these sentiments, these regrets, I’m not alone. I know that I’m not the only who wishes I could have told you all these things. And with this, I’m done turning my head and talking backwards and exercising my hindsight. Although I can’t change what I’ve done, what you’ve done, what I can do is pave the steps for my future me, a girl who is far superior in every way because she knows what I did not. So goodbye for now; I’m done looking back. I’m going to take lengthy strides into the golden embrace of my future. There’s nothing left to do but focus on the now and the later.

 

A for F-fort? Competence not Required

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Success has always been defined by whether or not someone is...well, successful. At least, that is how the proverbial "real world" operates. People are judged based on what they actually achieve, based on what others can see, hear, and feel.

Then there is the world of school, where this basic concept of rewarding real success has been skewed beyond recognition. Some claim that in giving out grades, teachers should look beyond the end results and take into consideration the amount of effort students have invested.

Such an argument is at once flawed, if not downright invalid. Some students enjoy griping loudly about how they stayed up all night perfecting their essay. Others keep these details to themselves. Some students approach the teacher every day after school to ask for help. Others simply intensify their own efforts at home or in the library. It is impossible for teachers to objectively measure how hard each and every one of their students try.

Performance is the only accurate indicator of merit. If we assume that success is an automatic result of any attempt, it becomes easy to lose the motivation to truly excel. Sadly, this is precisely what is happening to many young adults who are currently in school. A recent study conducted by UC Irvine found that students expect to earn B’s just for attending lectures and completing the required reading—in other words, fulfilling absolute minimum requirements for any academic course. It appears we have forgotten the simple, natural fact that a high grade must reflect a high level of accomplishment, not the lowest passing standard.

We need to outgrow the belief that we will get rewarded just for trying. This sense of entitlement is naïve at best and dangerous at worst. What will happen if we start granting important or authoritative positions to anyone who puts forth a basic effort? Imagine if everyone who wants to drive can obtain a license just for trying, or if college degrees are handed out regardless of any concrete standards.

Are hazardous traffic and the devaluing of education not alarming enough? How about if every time a politician breaks a promise to his constituents, he simply excuses himself by saying that he tried his hardest? How much time, money, and lives will be needlessly sacrificed if effort becomes the sole criteria for hiring doctors, lawyers, astronauts, soldiers, or pilots?

It is time we realized that by placing equal value on performance and effort, we are actually doing ourselves a great disservice. This mentality puts us at a big disadvantage in a society that is unequivocally results-oriented.

And no, I am not saying that effort should count for nothing in the grading system. It is important that we also encourage dedication and effort in students. What needs to happen is a shift in mindset, one which will finally bring us back into the realm of common sense and rationality.

 

SOS! This RelationShip is Sunk

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There’s nothing quite like singlehood to make you feel like a social pariah, no experience as fraught with self-pity as watching the endless sea of couples around you and secretly clamoring to join them (and, of course, longing to finally change your relationship status on Facebook). Friends and acquaintances saunter past your single, solitary self, significant others perpetually affixed to their arms, while your own limbs remain painfully, obviously bare. The perks of a relationship are just too great to ignore. Not only are you guaranteed a date to every major school dance, but you also have a person you can whip out at the appropriate opportunity, offering the world solid, undeniable proof that you are not a loner.

But first you have to find someone to be in a relationship with. And the instant you stop obsessively searching for potential relationship candidates, the very instant you’re inclined to throw in the towel altogether, the right person stumbles into your path at the right time. Before you know it, the two of you are walking around the hallways with your hands superglued together, hardly daring to believe your good fortune. You’re inseparable in every sense of the word, so closely connected that splitting you apart would probably cause an explosive nuclear reaction, so close that you’ve practically become a single entity.

And suddenly, life seems so wonderful. How did you never notice that before? You wake up each day with a huge smile spread across your face and a million plans regarding the future.

You laugh at all the times you considered yourself in love before, knowing now, with all the wisdom of newfound experience, that you were terribly mistaken. That was childish infatuation, little more than a series of meaningless crushes. This is something greater than that, something simultaneously genuine and bewildering and fascinating—something Real. The bonds you share simply cannot be broken—they’re so strong that they transcend the boundaries of mere emotion and enter the realm of powerful chemical attraction. What’s the term for that, anyway? Ionic? Covalent? Whatever. You’re sure you’d know the answer if you actually paid attention in Chemistry, but lately, your mind has been preoccupied with other matters.

Time passes in a jolly sort of way, and life is good—better than ever before, in fact. You’re confident that your current state of affairs will last forever.

Then one evening, the unthinkable happens—instead of filling up with your nightly bombardment of text messages, your inbox remains mysteriously blank. You’re sure there must be some kind of mistake at first—your service is malfunctioning, perhaps, or else your clock is set to the wrong time zone. Yet you can’t quite shake the unsettling feeling that a more unwelcome force is in play. You lie awake well into the early hours of the morning, staring at the rectangular patch of cellphone light so intensely that the words "No New Messages" permanently burn themselves into your retinas. And gradually it dawns on you—it’s an undeniable sign that things aren’t Meant To Be.

And sure enough, the next time you see each other, something has changed in a subtle yet perceptible way. The magnetic attraction is gone; the only real spark left between you is the occasional prick of static electricity. You feel a sense of impending doom, an approaching calamity of cataclysmic proportions. Three weeks and five words later, it’s over.

And suddenly, life really sucks. Your heart has been spit upon, stomped upon, shoved into a blender, and generally subjected to all manner of gross indignities. The days drag by listlessly, aimlessly, as though every ounce of happiness has been sucked out of the world. You spend your first post-breakup hours removing the "awww"-inspiring quotes from your Buddy Info and replacing them with the most depressing lyrics you can find, secretly hoping that a certain someone might yet be persuaded…

But in a few weeks, that’s all old news, for some worthier person has caught your eye, and a new conquest is yours for the making. So much to do, so little time.

 

Don't Wait, Medicate

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It seems we have once again forgotten the simple concept of prevention.

It’s not a particularly novel idea by any means. By stopping an undesirable event from happening before it occurs, we spare ourselves from its various detriments. That’s why we don’t let kids run around with scissors: because we would run the risk of unseemly accidents. That’s why we invented the vaccine: so we could prevent diseases from becoming epidemics. Prevention makes sense conceptually, and its implementation is not impossible either. So why have we in America yet again forgotten the importance of preventative measures with regards to the pharmaceutical industry?

Because sometimes we just don’t think ahead. Scratch that—sometimes we just don’t think at all. Government research has proven, time and time again, that people with mental health issues rarely get the specialized care and diagnosis they need. And yet an obscene amount of money is spent on the treatment of these diseases which we haven’t yet cared to identify. We shouldn’t be surprised that people get overmedicated; it’s only logical that it should happen when we choose to ignore disease prevention and subsequently find ourselves with an overwhelming necessity for medication. Writes Judith Warner in The New York Times: "The notion that American children and adults are being overmedicated for exaggerated disorders has now become one of the defining tropes of our era."

And over-diagnosis has indeed become a definitive aspect of modern-day America—not only in medicine, but in the sociological sphere as well. The fact that Americans take prescription drugs all too readily may be a poignant indicator of our cultural disposition. Perhaps unthinkingly, we hurt ourselves, subconsciously thinking that we can patch it up later. And it’s not a stretch to say that this attitude has infested our society on every level possible. On the contextual level of high school students, for example, we can see a burgeoning affinity for coffee—assumedly not so much for the taste of the drink as for its voluntary sleep deprivation capabilities. But would it be such a radical idea to say that coffee, the mascot of the majority of our school’s junior population, should take a backseat to prudence and diligence? That we ought to prevent ourselves from needing this medication, so to speak, by simply doing our work earlier?

Or must we continue, students, doctors, and people in general, to bail water out of a sinking ship without thinking to plug the hole?

 
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